


41 Years - The complicated personal life of Peggy Carter

by 101 Sweet Dreams (Cartertharsis)



Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-16 21:26:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10579794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cartertharsis/pseuds/101%20Sweet%20Dreams
Summary: An imagining of what may have transpired in Peggy Carter's personal life after Agent Carter Season 2 up to just before Ant Man.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Qujannamiik](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Qujannamiik/gifts).



> Published in honour of Peggy Carter's birthday and the inaugral "Walk Like Peggy Day". This fandom is amazing and I have met some truly wonderful people through it. This is the gift that you never asked for. Know your value!
> 
> My first and probably last fanfic, which has been written out of exasperation at the cancellation of Agent Carter and how Season 2 ended. It's a desperate attempt to reconcile what should have been without disrespecting canon.
> 
> Huge thanks to Qujannamiik for sorting out my terrible punctuation and just being generally super.
> 
> This is a fan fiction using characters from the Agent Carter TV series that were created by Marvel and the author seeks no ownership or profit from this publication but would be very grateful if everyone could just pull their finger out and #SaveAgentCarter. A movie would be nice ;-)

Act One: Mrs Carter

 

“M’am, M’am?”  
Oh I can hear them alright but I just want to lie here a moment longer and thank my lucky stars. 

“Do you know where you are?”  
Please just leave me be, I know full well where I am. Not gonna answer them just yet.

“We just need to ask you a few questions?”  
“What’s your name M’am? Do you know your name?”  
“I’m concerned that this lady is vulnerable. Page psych.”

You gotta be kiddin’ me! A person takes a five minute breather and they think she’s looney tunes. These kids, playing doctors and nurses… what a day… what a life. 

“M’am, M’am? Can you open your eyes?”  
Are they stupid or something? Of course I can, I choose not to. Not yet, I just want some peace for a minute more. Don’t they know what I nearly lost? Well, how could they. There’s only one person in the world that would get it and where’s she been for the past 41 years? Not here, not with me, that’s where! Still I didn’t lose it…

“I’m really concerned. She looks so frail. How old do you think? 75?”  
Excuse me! I heard that. I’m in my early 60’s thank you and it’s rude to ask a person her age. My English would’ve put you right in your place for that. Oh, my English… was she my English?… I’m being silly now, of course she is, was. 

“M’am, are you playing with us?”  
“Hey, watch your bedside manner, you’re already on thin ice Staff Nurse.”  
“Seriously, I swear a smile flickered across her face.”  
No flies on that one! I just can’t face talking to them right now. I know I’m gonna have to so I can bust out of this joint but now? I wanna be here with my memories by myself for a minute. I wish they’d go away. I just can’t imagine what Id’ve done if I’d lost it. It’s ok, breathe, you didn’t. Phew.

“Well let’s see if we can make you more comfortable… damn she’s got that necklace in a death grip…”  
You better believe it kiddo. It’s the one thing that keeps me going. The one actual thing that keeps me believing that the promises that came with it were… are… true. 41 years and no one came close… not that I’d let them. This little piece of gold, a lifeline from my Love… crazy really.

“Oh lady, don’t think I can’t see that tear… here, let me wipe it away while you carry on playing dead. I won’t tell.”  
I wish I could tell you. About my life, my Love, my English. I know it’s not such a thing these days but she’s an important woman… far more important than you’d believe. She’d stop you in your tracks with just a look and boy, did she take my breath away… Who am I kidding?... everyone’s actually but only I got to see the real…

“You’ve had quite an adventure today by all accounts…”  
Really? You’re gonna interrupt me? Where was I? Real? Oh yeah, the real kind, sweet and soft (and yeah I mean that in every way) woman that I knew. The weary fighter who’d come home raging and who after a kind word would dissolve into tears. And yep, yours truly would be there to…

“You know the other guy is actually alright. You didn’t kill him. Thought I’d mention it, in case that’s why you’re, well you know… pretending to be… whatever.”  
I like this one, perhaps I’ll just open half an eye and see what I’m dealing with… who’s this now? Can’t a girl get any peace?

“Staff Nurse, you requested an evaluation?”  
“I did, but I’m not sure that the patient is up to it yet. She’s not very responsive Doctor.”  
Oh I really do like this one! 

“Mmm I see what you mean. Well, stay with her and when she’s ready, call me back”  
I owe you one, what’s your name? Oh yeah, Staff Nurse! Funny name!

“I saw that smile again lady! You owe me, so how about you tell me who you are and what’s going on in there, so that we can help you?”  
How can I tell you? And if I did there’s nothing you could do that would help me. Christ! I can’t even help myself.

How would you ever understand what it was like after the war? ‘The war to end all wars.’ What a friggin’ joke! Only I realised that, sooner than most. It never ended for her, my English. Every day was a battle but not so’s any regular Joe would notice…

Can I tell you that I fell in love with her the moment I set eyes on her? So poised, so commanding and yes, although this was not a word that I would have allowed to even enter by head back then, so damn… hot. I didn’t need to put it into words, I felt it in my very core, longing…

Shall I tell you that I used to have a dream that we’d be together forever, living in that swanky penthouse? One face to the world and another for each other. She’d go and protect our freedom, while I took to the stage. Then quietly we’d come back home and just be… us. It was an amazing dream… but that’s all it was.

How can I tell you what really happened? It was such a different time that doesn’t make sense to anyone now. How I lost everything when I lost my Love. It wasn’t her fault. She’s always so brave but just not brave enough to fight for us, not then… or now… 

Will you believe me when I tell you that I don’t feel betrayed? When a piece of me does and always will. Still here I am still clinging to the one token, or as my English called it, troth. ‘To you my Darling, I plight my troth for eternity, in this life and all others.’ is what she said. And I know, even 41 years on, that she meant it. We said so much else with and without words…

You would never understand how my heart leapt when she returned to the Penthouse after that long summer. Oh, it’s all flooding back now. I was over the moon to see her but she looked so changed and it wasn’t just the sun tan. I couldn’t put my finger on it… awkwardness. There were always sparks between us and I do mean ‘us’. Sure, we’d never acted on it, although let me tell ya that took some restraint! But this day was different… 

How can I tell you that I just sat there passively listening to her map out her life plan? The one without me in it. That she was moving to LA to be married, because although she loved me, ‘yes of course, in that way Darling’, we could never have the life we each deserved together. Respectability, children… a God damn white picket fence! Well I did! I sat there very passively, steeling the courage and then I did it… well and truly… pushed my English’s buttons…

Would you believe that all took to break through the BS was me giving the best performance of my life, casual and calm… ‘Well thanks for the intel Agent. Now I have the full picture based on your compelling statement of what has to be and what’s best for everyone. If I couple this with the circumstantial evidence that I have personally gleaned in your presence, there is only one conclusion to be drawn.’ With that I turned on my heels, leaving her bewildered and if you knew my English, you’d know she doesn’t do bewildered... 

Shall I tell you that you that she followed me upstairs and I could feel her eyes blazing? That she tried so hard to get me to tell her what I meant, while I was packing my suitcase. Then as I snapped it shut, we locked eyes as I straightened myself to be as tall as I could and went for her jugular. I didn’t falter and my seething voice didn’t waiver ‘Agent Peggy Carter, I accuse you of being a complete and utter… coward!’ 

Will I tell you what happened next, how she charged at me and knocked me flying? She was ready for a fight, so help me, I was ready for fight too. But when we collided the sparks flew and well…I hope you’re not easily offended but it was passion beyond anything I’d imagined. Desperate, hungry, insatiable and yet, what a cliché, it felt like home…

I shouldn’t really tell you that after months of longing I had her right where I wanted… needed her? How the promise of those luscious lips, that tortured me with every word, was criminally understated in my imagination. And those breasts, my God when I finally had them in my sights, under my hands, in my mouth and, well as my English would say ‘in for penny in for pound’, between my legs… I wanted to die right then and there…

I will tell you that hours of frenetic fucking gave way to something… well if you don’t think I’m a crazy lady already, you will now… spiritual. My English had moved her treasured family crest from her swan like neck to mine as she said “Steve had my heart for a time and Daniel has my love but you my precious Angie have my very soul. No matter what happens, never forget that you carry me with you always. You are and will forever be, my wife.” Then she was inside me as she plighted her troth, like I told you earlier. In that moment we were truly one… 

How can I tell you that when I woke up, she was gone and I’ve spent 41 years trying to live a life? Yeah, I never did get that big break so I carried on doing what I knew… bussing tables. Eventually I ended up running the joint, who gets left a restaurant in a will? Me apparently! Go figure. It’s a tough gig, so you see, it’s no wonder I look older than I am! The clients aren’t as classy as they used to be. It’s all burgers and fries… I miss rhubarb pie. No hot English Tea to be found in my place, sadly…

Can I tell you that I’m over my English? Well truth is Staff Nurse, I can’t. I know she married the man, has a couple of kids and became a fancy Director of something or other…but I also know I carry her with me, I’ve got this trophy that proves it and that’ll just have to do. Well that… and the medication when it gets real bad…

Should I tell you that’s why I nearly killed a man over this little piece of gold? It’s not worth much to him really but you see, it’s worth everything to me…

“Err… Angie… If I may call you that M’am… you just did!”

“Dammit, was I talking out loud?”

“Yes, M’am you were. Now you’re going to have to repeat some of this to the psych and the police. Perhaps we should work on an edited version?”

“Oh sure, you can call me Angie, Staff Nurse. No point trying to maintain my dignity now!”

 

******************************************

 

Act Two: The Marriage

 

Scene 1:  
Two people are in a bedroom, he is in the bed, a wheel chair and an oxygen tank off to the side. She is in a large wingback chair. Both of them a pretending to read. He a book, her one of the reams of files stacked by her feet.

Well not long now, I can feel it creeping…if it wasn’t for them I’d just let go. They want to see me fight and of course I will. It’s what a real man, husband and father does. Look at that woman. How did you get so lucky and marry that one Sousa? Almost 40 years but you know what Peg, as hard as I try, I don’t think I’ll make it to that party. 

It was the best day of my life and she never looked more lovely. I held my breath at the “any lawful impediment” part and I saw something unrecognisable flicker across her face. I couldn’t allow myself to believe that the ghost of Steve Rogers was haunting my bride. Instead I did what I am best at, rationalisation. 

I decided that it was, in fact, the wince of an independent, person who thought she was selling herself short with the shackles of marriage. Hitching her wagon to a man along with the limitations that tradition usually implied. But then this is Peggy Carter we’re talking about and anyone who knows her, would have known that it would always be on her terms and that these were almost always right. 

During the wedding breakfast, when she thought no one was looking, I saw the sadness for a moment. Then the deep breath that preceded her warm smile. I determined that before we could go any further, I would have to make it right. Allay her fears. 

As the celebration waned we retired. We both knew what was expected. There she was, on my lap, kissing me earnestly and as she reached round to undo the laces of her bodice I stopped her. She froze and looked at me with a mixture of shock and curiosity. It was then that I reassured her that we had entered into a partnership and that as long as we both remembered who we were, this would be the most successful marriage in the history of wedlock. I watched the tears well up in her eyes as she spoke softly. We agreed then and there that she would never be referred to as Mrs. Sousa.

We had a good life. So good. More than a war-ravaged amputee could dare to hope for. The joy of our children. They took their time coming but that was no surprise given the weeks that our work separated us. I’ll never forget the rush of pride and fierceness that hit me when she said “Daniel, I believe we’ve done it! We’re going to be parents.” .

Peggy was so efficient. The effective and imposing Director of Shield, the warm but formidable mother of two and the best wife a man could ask for. Every once in a while I would see it again. The look from the alter. It confused me every time. I thought I had it all figured out. As time went on I came to realise I was wrong. 

I couldn’t ignore it forever but I could see that it was so raw, so painful and so very private. An emotion that was exclusively hers and if I ever even tried to tackle it, she would sternly brush me away. 

Well life rolled on but the Agent in me couldn’t let it lie. You see I had noticed a pattern. At the end of every summer she disappeared for a week or two, not physically but I’d be damned if I could reach her. Sure she was there, she never missed a beat but I knew something was off. She was quiet and most frightening of all ambivalent, like an empty shell. What was it about the fall? The most beautiful time of the year through almost everyone else’s eyes. 

We ran our household in what would be considered a very modern way, even now. Shared roles and responsibilities and of course separate finances. One of the only rows we had was over money, of all things. The rest were to do with her reckless behaviour during missions. 

It must have been getting on for 20 years ago and I had itchy feet, well an itchy foot! The children were getting bigger and I thought we could do with more space. Every time I broached the subject she would put up a block. The wrong time in the school year, work just wouldn’t stand it right now, why would we want to live all the way out there... Until she came clean and said she was concerned about the family finances. 

Although I didn’t know what the Director of Shield earned, I told her whatever it was it was not enough and she should demand a raise from Howard. Weeks turned into months and in exasperation I said, damn straight, I was going to get that raise out him myself. Well that was that. She knew I meant it, went ballistic and forbade me to get involved in her personal affairs. That only whet my appetite.

Using my professional experience and contacts, I conducted my own investigation. Man, she had tried to cover her tracks but even she hadn’t reckoned on my persistence. It was then that I found out about the small fortune that she had spent buying a restaurant in New York. So many aliases and middle men but it was her distinctive writing that gave it away. A quick trip to the Big Apple, a look through a window and there she was. Peggy’s old roommate from all those years ago, the one she lost contact with after that fall. From the point on, it all fell into place for me and I was devastated.

One night after we’d put the kids together and were congratulating ourselves for having brought two such special beings into the world, I caught her off guard. I asked her if she was planning to leave. She looked confused and then reeled like I had punched her in the guts. After a beat she said ‘Daniel, why on earth would you think that? I solemnly swear that I meant every single word of my marriage vows.’ In truth, I knew that she did and I also knew right then what I had to do for the love of my life, if the time came.

So here we are. I’ve had a great life. With the best wife a man could wish for. A true life partner as the kids would say now. I can feel the time approaching, faster with every passing minute. I don’t want to leave but this is one fight I am not going to win.

I beckon her over and of course she comes quickly. She removes the mask in response to the gesture that took so much out of me. 

“Hush dear, you’ll wear yourself out. Do you need some more morphine?”  
I look deep into those watery brown eyes and finally say what I have been planning for years. The relief is instant as I fade, knowing that now she has a choice.

 

******************************************

 

Scene 2:  
(Runs concurrently with Scene 1) 

 

This bloody job! Why did I ever agree to it. After all this time and the progress made you would think that there would be less call for my work. At least the threat used to be obvious. Oh the irony. I used to fight the communists, now it’s the bloody capitalists! Insider trading, money laundering and I thought the world had hit rock bottom with Watergate… Sometimes I want to give it all up. All this blasted paperwork. It was so much easier when a good hiding sufficed. “Victrix Patientia Duris”! I’ll never be a model Carter because there’s never enough time for patience in my experience. 

No, Peggy. You’re fooling yourself. It’s who you are and in no small part thanks to that lovely, fading, person over there. I knew right away he was a good man. You always did know how to pick ‘em Carter. 

It’s becoming increasingly hard to face the future. What will I do? How will I cope? Until now I have been moored in this safe haven, kept buoyant by our love. He stands by my side unflinchingly, for better or for worse. My God he’s had his fair share of worse to abide. I once told him he was one of the lucky ones, that was before it was all so complicated and entangled. Now I am not so sure.

Daniel’s always been such a modern man, his own man. He has such a strong moral compass, that he cannot betray. Of course I knew he had a little crush on me but when he thought I was a traitor he didn’t hesitate to do the right thing. That’s such an attractive quality in a person, positively heroic under certain circumstances.

And then there’s his protective nature that the poor man has to try and hide from me. I know he would wrap me up in cotton wool if he could. Perhaps he would have been happier with Violet after all. I am ashamed to admit that I was actually jealous of the women who put me back together. Me, the great Peggy Carter, who would have the world believe that I am independent and untouchable.

Daniel had clumsily tried to express his interest before then but I was preoccupied with another. We got our wires crossed and what I meant as a raincheck, he took as a brush off and left town. I suppose we both had exploring to do and I was still nursing my broken heart. My first love. So tragically taken from me and all I could do was rage against the world. That is until…how did Jane Rule put it?…”she just reached right in and put a string of lights around my heart”…

Keep it together Director Carter! I never could read that book without wondering what might have been…had I not been a…a…she was right all along. For all the triumphs, awards and accolades that testify to the contrary…

It catches me every autumn, the pain of separation. That void, tugging at me. It’s just a good job that I’m used to hiding in the shadows and when I can’t, I just show the world my stiff upper lip. I couldn’t bear it if I thought for one moment that this good man, outstanding husband and most wonderful father had even the slightest inkling. 

Then again, our time is running out. Does he deserve or need to know the truth or am I trying to salve my conscience? If I were to tell him everything what would I say… 

Daniel, you’ll never know the number of times that I wanted to tell you. And they were numerous my dear. Sometimes out of guilt. Often out of the desire to be truly honest. To stop hiding. You tried so hard to comfort me but it just left me more desolate. As much as I wanted to confess, I couldn’t bear the thought of re-inforcing your inate belief that you are less than whole. I know that there is not another man on this earth that I could love and respect more than I do you. 

Watching your careful devotion to our family perpetually reinforced my belief that I made the right decision. I chuckled to myself as you wrestled the monsters under the beds and frightened the closet ghosts right back! Our children always felt loved and secure and our home was usually filled with laughter. How you sat up all night through earaches and mopped fevered brows. But it was when our son told us that he was homosexual that your parenting skills came into their own. I confess that I found it difficult, over thinking as usual. However, you were the beacon who lit the way with pure unconditional love and navigated our family through the “storm in a tea cup”, as only you can.

I know that you found it difficult when I railed against indoctrinating our daughter with fairy tales of princess weddings. I never wanted our children to confine themselves as I have done. The world is changing and it’s been our duty to equip them adequately for all of the possibilities. Besides, the truth is, what I had been told would be the best day of my life was far from it. I chose to commit myself, in this life, to you Daniel but it was never in the way that you believed. I was so conflicted that day. I wanted so much for us to have it all but you see I’d already given away the biggest piece of me. How could I ever tell you that? How would you understand that it doesn’t diminish what we have. I chose and choose you. 

Our wedding night was special, you were so thoughtful and any doubts I had about my decision were fading. Do you remember me saying ‘You’re a good man Daniel Sousa. I’m not entirely sure I deserve you.’ Well, I’m still not sure. Keeping my name meant the world to me, not only because us Brits are irrationally proud of them but because my wife is out there somewhere bearing it around her neck. There, I’ve said it. My wife.

Those doubts were truly fading my dear, until I realised that our love life would only ever be physically satisfying, never matching up to my first wedding night. It’s not that I’ve ever just lain back and thought of England, you know I’ve always been more active than that. But in the end, I crave the connection that is never made. I could never tell you that those occasional ‘special good mornings’ as you called them, when I was only semi- conscious, it was not you that I was with. My mind was elsewhere with the one who has my soul. You could never touch me the way she had and in those moments, I allowed myself to let go and remember how she worshipped my body. Of course, you had a spring in your step and a twinkle in your eye for the rest of the day and I took some solace from that.

I have always done my best by you and her too. You know how I steadfastly refuse to set foot in New York? Well Daniel, it’s because that is where she is and I cannot trust myself to be so close to her and keep my promises to you. It won’t be a surprise to you that I have assigned Agents to safeguard her surreptitiously. There’s also the small matter of securing her future too. I bought the restaurant she was working in from its ailing owner on the condition that he left it to her in his will. I knew I had to take responsibility for her losing her confidence in her abilities. It was me who had knocked the stuffing out of her. There now you know it all and why we couldn’t move to that bigger house!

Perhaps I have selfishly cheated you both. 

Honestly Peggy Carter, how on earth do you think that any of this makes any sense… its like some bizarre comic book story…oh you’re calling me over….

Deep breath, smile on and whatever you do, don’t cry. He needs you to be strong.

Against my better judgement, I remove the mask as he has requested. His breath is shallow and his voice rasping barely recognisable.

“I’m real tired Peg. I need you to make some new vows. Will you?”  
I nod without really taking in what he’s saying. At times, it’s hard to know whether it’s my husband or the morphine talking.

“I, Peggy Carter promise…”  
I look at him numbly.

“Say it!” and so I repeat the first line and the lines after…

“I, Peggy Carter promise faithfully that I will carry on living life to the full and be happy.”  
Realising that this is his way of saying goodbye as kindly as possible, I gently kiss his lips being careful not to smother him. As I pull away, my dear husband speaks his last words…

“You promised Peggy, now go get your girl!”

 

******************************************

 

Act Three: Life goes on

 

It’s been a tough six months. The hospital is crazy busy all day, every day and sometimes I wonder if it is really what I was put on this earth to do. Of course there are some good things about it too or I guess I’d go do something else with my life. One really good thing was the day that I was assigned to that crazy lady who promptly over shared. You know I’m glad she did. It kinda bonded us really. You can’t know that much about a person and let them walk out of your life. Well I can’t. I know, I know, I’m just a born carer. Sure in the beginning I was kinda checkin up on her. Making sure she really was ok, taking her meds and everything. Then she flipped the tables on me. 

On those rough days when you just can’t save everyone, I would find myself at her restaurant. The comfort and nourishment that her speciality pasta, ‘just like Nonna used to make’ would ooze through my aching being and it became addictive. She always knew just what to say. When to press me into talking about it and when to just leave me be. Really, you should see her work the room. It’s quite something. I came to understand that she’s born carer too. It should be in all the guide books, if ever you find yourself drowning in New York City go to Martinelli’s for good food and a stiff talking to. 

Tonight was one of those nights. I needed to just be around the place and maybe I did need a talking to from Aunt Angie. Don’t laugh! That’s what I call her. Turns out she’s everyone’s Aunt Angie. Just the right amount of familiarity with respect for her years. It’s a good fit on her. You can’t be with her for long and not feel her care.

“Hey there Staff Nurse!”  
Why does she still insist on calling me that?

“Oh Honey, you look really beat tonight. Was it a bad one? Wanna talk about it?”  
She ushers me a quiet booth, instructing one of the waiting staff to get me my usual drink. Perhaps that’s part of it, it’s so easy, she always knows what to prescribe.

“There you go, get yourself comfortable. So, let me see…I think the only thing that’s gonna fix this Mama’s Meatballs with… well simple is best…spaghetti. Not too much chilli tonight I think. Yeah that should see you right.”  
I just nodded, Aunt Angie knows best! She put her hand over mine and gave it light squeeze as she assured me that she’d see to it personally and I’d have my food in a ‘New York minute’.

I sank back into the banquette and noticed that in fact the restaurant was quite busy for this time of night. I just let my eyes close and soak up the warmth and familiarity.

“Hey Kiddo! Wake up! Come on Staff Nurse! I didn’t bust a gut making this sauce all day for you to let it go cold.”  
As I prise my eyelids open I see the look in her eyes, and it’s not for me. She knows very well who I am but it’s happened before. There’s something about my beat-up days that reminds her of the one that went and left her. Maybe one day someone will look at me that way for real and when they do I will never let them go. 

“So, I’ve got this great hard cheese that finally came from Italy. Six weeks to get cheese, can you believe that? Anyway, I think it would top off those meatballs just fine. What d’ya say?”  
I say that she’s the boss and before I can put down my glass she’s back with a grater and I’m mesmerised by the falling flakes. In fact, we both are, as she chatters on oblivious to everything else. That’s when it happened…

“Excuse me, I wonder if I might have a word?”  
There are no more flakes as she freezes over my plate and I watch the colour drain out of her face. Just as I think I’m going to have to catch her, she straightens up like a shot. Stiff as a board.

“I can see you’re busy and that it’s probably a bad time but nevertheless, I wonder if you might spare me a moment?”  
Her eyes start to glisten and then it hits me like a freight train…that’s an English accent. My eyes flash a question to Aunt Angie and she gives me the slightest nod of confirmation but still she doesn’t turn around. How can she not turn around? 

I cock my head to the side and there she is! Wow! She’s everything I heard about over the last year and possibly more. She looks like she just walked off the set of Dynasty for God’s sake. All hair and shoulder pads, immaculate lipstick. Aunt Angie’s English in the flesh!

“Perhaps we could go somewhere more private?”  
Still no response… and I realise that I am not the only one holding my breath.

“Angie, Darling. Please don’t make this any harder than it is.”

With that, in a very controlled way, Aunt Angie turns herself and locks their eyes and hear the Brit whimper. And so she should. I give her a pretty mean look, not that she notices. As the woman continues I realise that she knows she is on the back foot…

“No, you’re quite right my Darling, here will do just fine. No more hiding. I wanted to come see if there is a chance…a chance that maybe you can… that you would… Ahhh what am I trying to say? Angie, not a day has gone by in these last 42 years when I haven’t felt it. I know you have too and I can only apologise for the way it had to be. It was all so different then, I wanted it all and if there was any way that I could have had it with you, you have to believe that it would have been so. I’m not saying that I regret my husband or my children, yes Angie, I have two and a grandchild on the way…You should see them Angie…the times I wanted to share things with you…I don’t want you to ever be angry with Daniel… He was such good man and I often wished that you would find a good person too…but every report the same, ‘no significant other’…the guilt of knowing it was me holding you back…the vows that we made…you need to know that he never touched me the way you did, I swear it…only you Angie. You have my soul and I gave you what else I could too my Darling… so help me, I even considered topping off the old bloke myself so you could have this place sooner…hearing how you scrimped and scrapped from tip to tip made me rage…watching from the shadows as your life was falling apart and knowing it was because of me…Every autumn torturing myself on the anniversary of our joining but the guilt of knowing that this pain was your lot every single day…I have not been a truthful person my Darling but I have been an honest one and the old adage is correct…the truth will always out…Angie what I’m saying is…I’m yours if you’ll have me…I’m ready now, are you?...no more hiding my Darling and there’s a whole family waiting for you… if you’ll have us…you see even the great Peggy Carter is not infallible… my clever, incomparable, husband knew everything and more than that, unbeknownst to me, he used this knowledge to assist our son though his coming out…so it turns out that my children know too…You know me Angie, truly you do…you know I am a proud and principled woman who doesn’t often take the easy path…but I take my vows deadly seriously and I am keeping the last one that I made too…so here I am to finally be with my wife…” 

As her words faded, the tears fell down her cheeks and still she gleaned no response. I was reeling from what I had just witnessed, the air so thick with the tension.

“Oh and one last thing, you were right my Darling…I am a complete and utter coward.”  
I watch Aunt Angie’s shoulders relax and can’t believe my ears…

“Shut up English, you still talk too much!”

Did she really just say that? What does she mean? Apparently, it was the right thing as I’m now witnessing two women in each other’s arms in their own space and time, their raw passion making me blush. The sparks are flying and I now know what the fusion of two souls looks like. 

Damn, I’ve gotta get me some of that!

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, it has internal,1st and 3rd person dialogue that I fully appreciate is not everyones cup of tea but this is how it turned out.
> 
> Feel free to stop by and say "Hi".


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